Goodnow (1998) described the rule of "one up, both up" developed by egalitarian

couples in her study which stipulated that when one partner was working on household

chores, the other should be as well; when this rule was violated by one partner relaxing as

the other worked, conflict ensued.

 In Kluwer's (1997) study of expectant parents, she found women's discontent with

the division of household labor was frequently associated with the wife-demand/husband-

withdraw conflict pattern, and that this pattern was strengthened when the husbands were

relatively content with the division of labor; this demand/withdraw pattern was associated

with negative conflict outcomes. When both partners were discontent with their division

of household labor, mutual blame and criticism characterized their conflict behavior and

was also associated with negative conflict outcomes. Kluwer concluded discontent with

the division of labor was either not associated or was negatively associated with

constructive conflict strategies.

 Parenting Roles, the Division of Labor, and Violated Expectations

 It may be unsurprising couples' primary topic of conflict during the transition to

parenthood is their division of labor. The roles new parents develop and carry out in their

emerging families are intertwined with their satisfaction in marriage. Yet the strength and

direction of this relationship varies between mothers and fathers. For husbands, the

quality of their marriage both before and after becoming a parent predicts the level and

quality of their involvement with their infants (Belsky & Kelly, 1994; Paley et al., 2005;

Shapiro, 2005; Van Egeren, 2004). For wives, fathers' involvement in the practical and

emotional aspects of child care and also fathers' completion of housework predicts

marital satisfaction, especially when their husbands' involvement matches the

expectations wives previously held (C. P. Cowan & Cowan, 1988; Cowan & Cowan,