188 THE PILGRIM’S PROGRESS.

not all; for Christiana did also begin to consider with herself, whether unbecoming

behavior towards her husband was not one cause that she saw him no more, and that —

in such sort he was taken away from her. And, upon this, came into her mind, by

swarms, all her unkind, unnatural, and ungodly carriages to her dear friend; which |

also clogged her conscience, and did load her with guilt. She was, moreover, much
broken with recalling to remembrance the restless groans, brinish tears, and self-
bemoanings of her husband, and how she did harden her heart against all his
entreaties and loving persuasions of her and her sons to go with him; yea, there was
not anything that Christian either said to her or did before her, all the while that his
burden did hang on his back, but it returned upon her like a flash of lightning, and
rent the caul of her heart in sunder. Specially that bitter outcry of his, “ What shall
I do to be saved?” did ring in her ears most dolefully.

Then said she to her children, “Sons, we are all undone. I have sinned away your
father, and he is gone; he would have had us with him, but I would not go myself;
I also have hindered you of life.”

With that, the boys fell all into tears, and cried out to go after their father.

“Oh,” said Christiana, “that it had been but our lot to go with him! then had it
fared well with us, beyond what it is like todo now. For though I formerly foolishly

-. Imagined, concerning the troubles of your father, that they proceeded of a foolish fancy

that he had, or for that he was overrun with melancholy humors; yet now it will
not out of my mind but that they sprang from another cause; to wit, for that the
light of life was given him,® by the help of which, as I perceive, he has escaped the
snares of death.”

Then they all wept again, and cried out, “Oh, woe Poxtly ire day!”

The next night Christiana had a dream; and, behold, she saw as if a broad parch-
ment were opened before her, in which were recorded the sum of her ways; and the
times, as she thought, looked very black upon her. Then she cried out aloud in her
sleep, “ Lord, have mercy upon me a sinner?’”’® and the little children heard her.

After this, she thought she saw two very ill-favored ones standing by her bed-side,
and saying, “ What shall we do with this woman? for she cries out for mercy waking
and sleeping: if she be suffered to go on as she begins, we shall lose her as we have
lost her husband. Wherefore we must, by one way or other, seek to take her off from
the thoughts of what shall be hereafter; else, all the world cannot help but she will
become a pilgrim.” :

Now she awoke in a great sweat; also a trembling was upon her; but after a
while, she fell to sleeping again. And then she thought she saw Christian her hus-