240


 LONDON LABOUR AND LONDON POOR.


FUTN.


 Labourer (to visitor) :-" LEND YER MY SPADE ? WELL, IT'S THE
 FIuST TIME I EVER SEED YOU WANT TO WORK!"
 Visitor:-VY, YE SEE, JIA BANKS AND BILL BLOKE AND ME TOS
 THINKING OF DOING THE "POOR FROZE-OUT WORKING' MAN" CHANT
 THIS WINTER.



 PAN AT THE PLAY
 "No more Irish need apply." This inscription ought to be painted
 in letters a foot long over the stage-door of every London theatre. A
 dash of the brogue is all very well now and then by way of a relish;
 but mustard without beef is a sadly innutritious diet. We have
 been so overdone of late with the Hibernian dialect, that we are
 almost incited to mako war upon PAT through irritation at his patois.
 That persecuted young Colleen Bawn has been soused so many hun-
 dreds of times-seriously and grotesquely-at different metropolitan
 playhouses, that she must by this time have arrived at the conclusion
 that it would have been a decided convenience to her to have been born
 mermaid. Then we have had White Boys at the Surrey and the Vic-
 toria, and Peep o' Day Boys at the Lyceum,-the manager of the last-
 named establishment not being content with pouring the accents of I
 Erin upon the hearing of the audience for three hours and a quarter,
 but actually conniving at the unwarrantable conduct of the author of
 his Christmas extravaganza in transporting poor little Red Riding
 Hood to the green isle, and causing pretty Miss LYDIA THOMPSON to
 speak that eccentric and purely original dialect, the invention of
 which does infinite credit to her creative genius. We may leave out
 of consideration the Irish Emigrant, seeing that no one would ever
 suspect that MR. W. J. FLORENCE was playing an Irishman unless in-
 formed to that effect by the playbill; but has not the Irish Girl been
 flourishing at the Standard, and does not the unapproachable Mn. F.
 ROBSON enact an Irish part in the latest Olympic burlesque ? But of
 this dark cloud which has been lowering over our stage, MR. BENEDICT
 has shown us the silver lining. Even double the dose of Hibernicism
I which we have been forced to swallow would have been compensated
Ifor by such a delicious lump of sugar as the Lily of '..' .. That


[MACH 1, 1862.


 the favourite pupil of WEBER, and one of the most accomplished of
 living musicians, should have written a charming opera, is by
 no means surprising ; but that a German writer should have so
 thoroughly imbibed the spirit of Irish melody, that his work, without
 a tinge of plagiarism, should be as intensely national in tone as if it had
 come from the hand of a native composer, is striking evidence of patient
 study and innate genius. The music is delicious; a how of exqui-
 site melody pervades it from first to last, and the instrumentation is
 as remarkable for its picturesque beauty and dramatic expressiveness
 as for its solid scientific merit. The execution was in all respects
 faultless. It would be well to stereotype the phrase, MR. ALFRED
 MELLON'S band was perfection," to save the trouble of writing the
 same words over again on the production of each new opera which
 that gentleman conducts. Miss LouIsa PYNE was angelic. Miss M'LEAN
 has suburb eyes, and it would be all the better if she did not know it,
 since in that case she might attend to the business of the scene in-
 stead of transfixing innumerable successive hearts with her radiant
 glances. Of MIss SUSAN PYNE no complaint whatever can be made,
 save that she looked so like her son's sister that the plot became at
 times foggy. Mn. HAnausoN was dramatically effective and vocally
 admirable; MR. SANTLEY sang and acted superbly; MR. HAIGH
 showed himself, as usual, to be one of the worst of actors with one of
 the sweetest of voices; and of MI. PATEY we will only say that when
 he awakes from his present dream, and discovers how much progress
 he has to make, he will probably begin to make it, and has quite
 enough natural abilityto arrive at a satisfactory result. The dialogue
 exhibited an extraordinary diversity of dialects supposed to be Irish,
 some of them invented with rare ingenuity; but then most of MR.
 JOHN OXENPORD'S flowing and graceful songs were given with an
 English accent, which was a great relief. The story is certainly not
 a good one for lyric purposes, and the present cast involves a wild im-
 probability-for who could possibly be false to Miss LouisA PYNE ?
 But the glorious music atones for everything, and the opera-the
 water Bcene, of course, especially-went off swimmingly.


 ZOOLOGICAL INTELLIGENCE.
 THE great Pythoness, with a liberality unheard of in these times,
 has presented the Zoological Society with one hundred eggs. Like
 the Pythoness of Delphi, she promises to prove a great profit to the
 proprietors, and in order to enhance the attractions of their exhibition,
 those gentlemen have engaged MR. SPURGEON to lecture on this
 interesting subject. At first sight their selection may seem strange;
 but the fact was that all the other clowns and comic men being
 engaged at the various theatres and other places of amusement, no
 other talent (!) was available, and on our recommendation the Taber-
 nacular one was sent for. The joy of the poor fellow at our notice of
 him was really touching; and, as the newspapers say, may be easier
 imagined than described. The following is the lecture C. H. S. pro-
 poses to deliver.
 As a natural and fitting prelude he will blow his own trumpet, and
 will then proceed:-
 "Walk up, walk up, ladies and gentlemen, and see the wonderful
 Pythoness. Her native place is West Africa, and her grief at leaving
 that desirable country residence accounts for her great size. This
 animal is one of the varieties of the boa family, though as a family
 boa she is hardly adapted to a lady's neck, and any gentleman who
 presented such a comforter to the object of his adoration, would be
 a muff that deserved cuffing. Her large proportions enable her to
 go great lengths when in pursuit of food, and to be caught in her coils
 is very fatal; from which fate all travellers recoil. Her principal diet
 is rabbits, and so fond is she of these interesting little creatures, that she
 always squeezes them to death; her sorrow at this result is so great,
 that she swallows them whole immediately after. Paradoxical as it
 may seem, she can't escape, though continually bolting. It is pre-
 sumed she is of rather a sporting nature, as she lately laid a number
 of eggs, and on these, like the Houses of Parliament, she is now sitting;
 while, to complete the similitude to our national legislators, when
 once she has taken her seat, it is a work of no little difficulty to causo
 her to vacate it, and anybody attempting to accomplish that feat
 might find himself cracked up by the press (of her coils) in a very
 overpowering manner. The way she snubs her husband is truly
 human, and offers a splendid example to strong-minded members cf
 the sex in general, and the advocates of the rights of women in
 particular. If any lady should oppose this view of the interesting
 creature's character, "mum" is the word I shall use in answer to
 her. Ladies and gentlemen, this concludes the entertainment; the
hat will now circulate, and so I hope will your coppers, as I need
hardly remind you that I have a large Tabernacle solely dependent
on my exertions."


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