MABCH 1, 1862.] F TJT. is a knowing kard, replide and bowled the varus speechers over pretty rappid, and wound up by saying the Sheffield blades wos beating the soards into crinileen hoops, which was nearly as dangerous. Then LORD CLARUNCE PADGIT got Dunned about the transports, and after a few wards about the Injun army the Hous got on the Highways, where a Barren first drove in the way, and there was some words from DEEDES, and indeed all of 'em got driving' abowt the road and telling their xperrunses. MR. BRUCE said he knowed a road in the bed of a brook, but it wasn't a road in course! And MR. HENLEY got a good deal laughed at for proposing to mend the roads with turtle soup. There wos a great divishun on the subject, and the bill wos red for a 2nd time. Finally Sun R, PEAL moved to bring in two bills, one for keeping' Donhybruk Farein fare order (and MR. SCULLY chaffed 'im abowt keeping his tempur), and another for amendin' the Irish poor law, witch is poor law enuff Evin knows! And so the House adjourned-witch I secundstthe moshun, and am yours trewly, Eaten Square. JON LIVVERY. To JOHN BRowN, Esq., Editor of the Biggleswade Independent, Biggleswade. DEAR BROWN,-On the 17th I dropt into the House,.and heard a little talk about a reform of the muddled Ecclesiastical Courts, the Galway Contract (which, instead of contracting, is expanding into a serious evil, inflicted on listeners in the Speaker's gallery), and the Bayswater and Kensington Road, which bids fair to be talked about (and only talked about) till the Exhibition opens. At last they got to the Estimates. Then rose JOHN BRIGHT-the fighting Quaker -in whom there is much to admire, much to condemn. In a word, no article that Brummagem ever turned out was as near being genuine metal; and nothing of their manufacture trusted as genuine metal, ever turned out as disappointing as he does. Of all the short- sighted un-English speeches ever made, his of Monday, the 17th of February, 1862, is facile princeps. The fact is, he insisted on all Liberals considering America as exactly what England might be made by Liberal measures. I, for one, have never thought so. Wooden nutmegs may look well, but don't grate savoury. Clocks with no works inside them may pass for furniture, but are not to be relied on as timepieces. And Liberal institutions, constructed of American materials, are very like wooden nutmegs, and clocks that won't figure. And the worst of it is, BRIGHT, having set up his American idol as a model ANTINOUS, is loath to see it upset. One thing everybody but JoaN BRIGHT sees plainly enough. If England's demand had not been followed by the appearance of our transports at the mouth of the St. Lawrence, there would have been "ferocious gesticulation" on the part of MR. SEWARD; which ferocious gesticulation would have consisted in his putting the end of his thumb to the tip of his nose, and extending his fingers in the direction of Great Britain, when she demanded reparation. It is very certain that we have disabused the Yankees (however much BRIGHT may abuse us) of a notion that was very likely-indeed certain-to bring on war at some early period. They thought we could swallow anything, that we were ready, to quote the words of the Bard of Biglow,- "To take sarse, and not be riled. Who'd expect to see a tatur All on end at being' biled ?" We have shown we are not so thick-skinned as a tatur," and before they peel us for the "bilin," we shall appeal to arms.-Yours truly, HENRY B. P.S.-I enclose a squib for the Independent:- A FEW RHYMES TO BRIGHT. We've got no ambition to fight, BRIGHT ! But we fancy it only is right, BRIGHT! When our note we indite, The' firm yet polite, To show that with Right we have Might, BRIGHT ! And are perfectly able to smite! On the subject to throw some more light, BRIGHT! We reveal of our fangs just a sight, BRIGHT ! If we bark we can bite And fix pretty tight. Peace is surer when Right has got Might, BRIGHT! No one hits him who's ready to smite! To THOMAs PURTLEBOYs, Bailiff, Biggleswade. DEER SuR,-On Toosday there wossunt much doin in Parlymen. There wos MR. WITE R ss:t about Jappanin' the British trayd, witch MR. HENRY said if MR. WITE had been a scollard he wnddent have askt if the Jappanned people had forbid us Porta Negael - or some sich place, witch I dare say is vwrry true, but, boeing no scollard, I don't see it no more nor Wile. And Mi. Cox, amid nunch crowin' and laffin', axed if Guvment was going to bring in a bill to re-form Parliament-with new seats, I sposo. Then there was a question abowt whether soljors was to go on shooting' their officers and be supplied with ball cartridge for the purpus, witch Sait '. Louis-said, as the officers themsolvs perford it, they was to. Thou there was something' about Queen's Colligo in ireland and thc Drains in England-leastwiso want's polightly called sowidge," but. I'm confused as to whether MR. POPE IiUNEASY talked sewidgo or col- ligc, and I've forgot, there was some tork of an expidishun to Scntril Australier that got Barked through some incapacity of the foax us had to manidge it. Weddingsday was mosly okipied in maridges. MuI. MiU'TINMiuN.Is brawt in his Affinity Bill, and Ml. LEGGIN opposed it in a sIpeech aCI wos long if itwosent strong. Orthorities-among iutlhrs a ddl llishop of Durham-Mustar'd pritty thick, along with LEVITIKi'S and utler digniteries of the church. But MRi. CoLLElR pitclit into his argy nicvi like split-oh! and leeved LEGGIN without a leg to stand on. Warcun, up stands LORD SESSILE, a very fulish yung man to my thinking unal try'd to be funny (witch lie wos quite onuf alroddy, and needun 'avo try'd to improve on natur), and said as maryin' one's ded wife's sister difered very Little from Biggermy. And then ho sed as MR. COLLER sed what he haddent sed, witch wos wot we Bliud call at the Piganwistle Debatin' Clubb-a lie!.' but the name ainti aloud in Parlymen the' the thing is. SmR G. GUEY, h1 was neither black nor wite but blowed hot and cold, and then hMR. WALLPULI.- why he wos MR. WALLruLL as uslial. But Mli. SrooNERI spoiak like a man, and sez he-" Its a soshul question not tll-illogical, and I think the lower class suffers at present So the 2nd mrdin was caryd by 11 majority. After witch Sit YEW KAINES ast love to interdoose his little Irish Bill about Maryin, witch he got it. Master disaproavs of tle maridges abuv, but yo see my bruther maryd his wife's sister, and lie cuddent a choas a better mnitlhr for the little uns, as know hir and she know thcn. So tio I'm a good Toary genrully when I trys to think Teary hiere, the site of tlecni little mutherless children rises afore me, anil 1 scz "to part em fro.n their seccund mother ud be like putin asunder those whom Gon li:u joined. ' On Thursday, after a discussion of the golld folds in Coluinhier, witch it scams is not a oax, and Terns inbankimcnt, and the 1'oii:, witch DR. GItFrIS (who mnado a good speech at Sutllampton the other day), wanted to know if we'd protested through our Minister in Tureen, agin the Ruinimmns protesting' agin' the teimperaill pour of tlhe POPE (whoso rain is near over)-and lie Imight a look at hlliiiU instead of at Roam, for the IIirish is troemlndous Protestants althow they are Catholics, and kick up no end of Bobbery as I'EAL, knows. IMR. BAImLY axod for a new rit for Glostor, and MR. Wi.ii, (the M.P. for the Gloab in Losotr skware), sekindid him. Snit G. GIIEY sedas Guvnent wuddent oposo that nor Waklficld, ind iill. Dizail:i:,y agreed. There was wan thing struck me-MRt. B. scd the dili'oncbliz- ment was hard on the comershul cumunity thero as they haivo no reprisentashun in Parlymon-which I think if they rely cared about it they would have taken more care of it when they hadi it. I don't know what the comershul cumunity does in Gloster or Wak'elTld-- but Glostor is famous for cheese, and Ivo hcord sumitlhin about Wiear work at Wakefeeld. Mil. BENTINK Bed 110e hoped next, limo Mlit. BARKLY was for lowerin the franchiz heed remuinicbr liow many plasis was conviktcd of brybry, witch lie meant, I spoiso it shudent be lowered. But I never hoercd as twas tile poor ami working classics as bribed--and if they is bribed inoro hlanio for the better classics as shud kno better nndl is no better then they shud be to go tempin' 'em. The klnmo of Wakefield was lissenl to though the House wuddent heer it. Presently the A'DoNwrriTrou ast fora return of all the British vesils that broke the Yanheo blolkedl, or have been cotched at it, and made a long Yankcclied spchi. Wareon MR. LAYIIARD said he shiudnt give it, first cos lie haddent got it and next becos Guvment wuddent do rite to give Parlmnci a list of them as dun wrong; and hinted that MiR. A'D hiaddcnt better throw sichlike stoans at people as broak the law, out of resprk for his own forcin frames. And the Sliciter-Genral got up and explained the lor - but lor what a long letter Ivo rit so conclowd.--Yours, Jon LivvEur. A VERY FREE TRANSLATION INDEED.-A "beginner" in Latin traiis- lated, a few days ago, the expression hujus magnitudinis," into of large size." AYE, RiE MAY.-May a man with STRAuRO's peculiarity highly marked, be said to be the squint-essenco of ugliness ?