/_156 IT U 1i [JANUARY 4, 1862.


 CAUTION TO OMNIBUS TRAVELLERS.
IF TIIS OLD GENTLEMAN HAD EXERCISED A LITTLE SELF-DENIAL, AND HAD WAITED UNTIL HE REACHED HOME BEFORE STUDYING HIS "FUN,"
 TIIE FRIGHTFUL ACCIDENT HERE DEPICTED WOULD NEVER HAVE OCCURRED.


 PRIZE ESSAYS BY THE FIRST AUTHORS.
 WE have much pleasure in placing before our readers the first two
of a series of Prize Essays, on the subject of our Noble Selves. These
highly concentrated specimens of style will be followed by many
more, at least equally characteristic. Among them will be found
contributions by MR. C--s D--s, MI. T-- s C--E, MRa.
H--N A-- MR. M. F. T--a, Miss H--T M--U, MR.
W--E C--s, MR. G. A. S--A, MR. W--R T-Y, MR. J--N
R--N, MR. A--D T- N, the REV. C-- s K--r, the Author
of Master Thomas Brown's Educational Career," CAPTAIN M- E
R--D, and the Poet C-- E.
 With this brief notification, we proceed to give an instalment which
cannot fail to raise the most agreeable expectations in the public
mind.
 No. 1.-BY MR. W. M. T-- .
 'Twas easy enough for LAURA to see that, although PHILIP wrote
largely for FUN, the young man's own heart was by no means in a
cheerful mood. Sure, MIous himself hath unpleasant feelings now
and then; and yonder clown, at whose delightful drolleries MASTER
BLENKINSOP laughs so loudly, hath a devoted slatternly Mrs. Clown
at home, and two little jack-pudding children that must be fed. I
protest that the young man often wrote his best jokes when he was
in extreme distress and a misery unspeakable. He had heavy
burdens to bear: as which of us is free fiom them ? Post equitem-
you know the rest. Ride never so gaily along the country road,
Atra Cura will spring up to the crupper, and honest GILES, as he lolls
by the turnpike gate, shall never dream that your worship's nag is
carrying two. Happiness, satisfaction, content; they have passed away
from us, I think. Eheu, my Posthumus! alas! for the fugaciousyears !
We are in our called youth no more; we are people of a certain age;


we grow stout; and PALMERSTON, not PLANCUS, is consul. Let us
read our FUN like honest old boys. A little laughter may do us good
still, though our livers 'are tending to congestion, and our steps-
whither? and sure MR. TRUEFIT best knows how 'tis we keep our
hair so well. Ah me! which of us has what he wants? Which of us
wants what he has ? Who is who? What is the use of anything at
all? Why should I preach to you-I, who am but a layman, and
have often enough missed the way myself? Let us leave PHILIP, I
say, to amuse his readers. Turn his face to the wall and pass on.
Come, my brother; we will go down to Greenwich and eat fish.
 No. 2.-BY MR. R---T B- G.
 You're my friend! So bring me a flask of wine;
 The true old Montepulciano sort,
 Pressed from the daintiest globes of the vine,
 None of your doctored logwood port!
 As here in an arbour I sit and swig,
 The waves of fancy flow fast and free;
 Here, GIACOMO, bring me the largest fig
 That is ripe on my neighbour's nearest tree.
 Ha! Corpo di Bacco! It stains my lips,
 Like the Hyblan honey, for ages hived,
 My brain is a-swirl with gladsome quips,
 For my favourite paper has just arrived!
 And e'en as by casting a stone in the lake,
 The circles go widening, one by one,
 So eddying ripples of laughter break,
 Round the chuckling heart of the central FUN.

 WHY is a wax candle like BULWER's "Strange Story" P-Because
it is a cereal work.


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