FUTTN.


 [DECEMBER 14, 1861.
[DECEMBER 14, 1861. 1


The scene is laid in CHARLEY POYNTER'S place in the country.-Timne, the vert middle of the dog days.-The plot is a scandalous one of
 CHARLEY'S, w2e believe.
 Charley:-WELL, YOU MUST PUT UP WITH PART OF MY BED FOR TO-NIGHT, OLD FELLOW. YOU WON'T MIND THE DOGS BEING IN THE
ROOM, AND THE BED IS QUITE BIG ENOUGH FOR ALL OF US."
 Fisitor:-"ALL OF US! WHY, WHO ELSE IS THERE?"
 Charley :-" Ou! ONLY THIS LITTER OF BULL PUPS!"


ENGLAND'S DESPATCH TO AMERICA.
 Tuus speaks the British LYONS:
 Yankee, remove those irons
 From the men whom you lawlessly have ta'en;
 England will never be
 Insulted on the sea,
 For the Lion is the Monarch of the Main.
 "Soon ye'll not dare to laugh
 Go, cut your flag in half,
 While your insult stern Britannia outwipes
 Old England's sturdy tars
 Will make you cry My stars!'


 CRITICIZABLE CRITICISM.
 A MONTHLY newspaper, which aims at rivalling the Saturday
Review, and only resembles it in being a weakly publication, treats us
to the following charming passage in a review of a new novel:-
 Some of the rustic sketches are remarkably good, and relieve the almost too
painful interest of the story. Farmer Wishart's interior, for example, and the
eccentricities of the farmer's wife, who has inherited a fortune, are real paintings
from nature, and lend a singular charm to the tale."
 We imagine that a painting from nature of Farmer WISHART'S
interior would give a very "singular charm" to any book calling
itself a novel-not a work on anatomy.


 When you feel upon your currish hides our 'stripes."' "THE DAM WAS LOOSED, THE STREAM FLOWED FBEE."-A paragraph
 has been going the round of the papers, describing how a person, who
 for some years had lost his speech, recovered it suddenly through the
 vehemence of an angry exclamation at losing a fish he had hooked.
 CARRYING OUT AN IDEA.-Some time since an American paper As this fact has been described as "a special Providence" by some
headed its announcements of Births, Deaths, and Marriages," as owre gude" folks, we venture to hint that the magical word which
" Hatches, Matches, and Despatches." The number of Divorces bids broke the spellof silence and set the stream of speech flowing, most
fair to make the list longer, and if we add the Gazette of Bankruptcy probably began with a d."
too, we shall have "Hatches, Matches, Despatches, Detaches, and
Flatcatches." THE FRENCH INVASION POSTPONED.-There does not appear to be
 BOCK AGAIN!"-Tait's Magazine, which every one thought dead, any fear of the much-talked-of French invasion, just yet; for, before
has just come to life again, the numbers for September, October, and the EMPEROR can get over the Straits of Dover, he must, as a matter
November all appearing together. After such a revival we cannot of course, first get over those in which he now finds himself placed.
but say that the proprietor is tdte hontde. POETIC MEASURES.-A new magazine, to consist entirely of verse, is
 SHORT AND SWEET.-A brief career,-that of EDWIx JAMES in to be issued under the title of Moder Metre, a Medium for the Poet of
England. the Day. We fear it is not likely to be the circulating medium.


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