F-UN .


[DECEMBEE 14, 1861.


 1st Shoeblack :-" Now, THEN, BILL, HERE'S A CONNUNGoRUM FOR YER. IWY IS
SURGEON LIKEr THE INFALLIBLE PILLS?"
 2nd Ditto:-" GIVE IT UP."
 1st Ditto:-" Cos H B'S A PERFECT CURE."


 AMERICA AND EDWIN JAMES.
 A DUET SONG OF AN ENLISTMENT.
 A. You fugitive counsel and ex-M.P.,
 Enlist as a citizen under me;
 Spout in my courts and shine at my bar,
 Yankees don't mind how tainted you are.
 E. J. I come, Ma. JONATHAN, to enlist pnder you,
 I'm quite out of work, and want something to
 do;
 You.know I'm ambitious, but now out of luck,
 With all my disgraces, Eve plenty of pluck.
 A. First, you can speech well?
 E. J. Cheerily, boldly;
 A. Plenty of bunkum tell?
 E. J. Hotly or coldly.
 A. Your answers are saucy, brisk, and free,
 Lacquer your brass, you'll do for me.
 A. You rose in ahurry, and so did I,
 The thing's to be done if you're 'cute and spry;
 Clients, constituents, scriveners too,
 Juries and widows were the sort for you.
 E. J. Excellent fun, and sparkling fame,
 By skilful hits at the folks you name,
 BERNARD, and Marylebone, Italy's friend,
 Tattersall's, Brighton, and.a.bankrupt end!
 A. Pray, are you humble ?
E. J. Never a bit!
 A. Some rise by a tumble,
B. J. My marriage to wit.
A. Your morals are pliant, you've audacity,
 You're just my slick sort, so enlist under me.



 THE MUSICAL WORLD.-It is perfectly absurd for
the English people to profess to be musical. In
spite of all the MAcFARRENS, LOVERS, BALFES, and
BISHOPs, foreigners will neverbelieve that we have
any taste or ear, so long as organs and German
bands are suffered to do discord in our streets,
unpunished by the strong arm of the law.
 THE REAL "PRAIRIE FLouR."-Indian corn.


 ALMANACK AND DIARY.
 ASTROLOGICAL AND METIEORILLOGICAL NOTICES.
FULL MOON.-The MOON will soon be quite full, thousands unable to gain
 admittance; all applications for seats must be made to CHARLES
 WAIN.
VOICE OF THE STARS FOR DECEMBER.-The weather has unfortunately
 not been favourable, and the stars, having lately been out a great deal
 at night, have entirely lost their voice.
PREDICTIONS FOR TlE MONTH.-There are signs offearful times coming on.

 of vampires, octoroons, and retired locusts, will again ravage the vine-
 yards of the metropolis. On the 26th of this month the expression,
 Here we are again !" will be in the mouths of many, but no deep
 political signification can be attached thereto.

 DECEMBER.
 8 5 Grand Oratorio at Lambeth Waterworks, and new sensation
 song by the BIsnoP OF LONDON, The See! the See!"
 0 M Horticultural f.te in the City, and Inspection of Stocks.
 10 Ti'S Ma ch of Intellect to Wimbledon and back.
 11 W Gold weather, but FUN keeps up a brisk circulation and is
 everywhere warmly received.
 12 TH DEEi'uOOTr runs against a lampost; burts himself.
 13 F At TATTEuSA.LL ', subscription list to the Thirty-nine Articles
 open from a shilling upwards.
 14 S The week expires: universally regretted by all who knew him.
 IN-Dooi AMUSEMENTS FOR DECEMBER.-This is a very cheery month
 for all recreations within the walls of our homes. We hasten to warm the
reader's fbet, hands, and heart by the following hints for games:-
 The Porpoisc.-Go into the dining-room and pretend to be a porpoise ;


if no one'will enter into the fun of :he fting, go into the hall and pretend
to be something else.
 Hunt the Slipper.-Hide your old uncle's slippers, or those of any
 elderly gentleman if irate and gouty; then empty the water-jug on his
 carpet: this should be done just after he has come in from a long walk,
 and immediately before he dresses for dinner. The hunt for the slipper
will be very exciting.
 Old King Cole.-A veryamusing game. Open the drawing-room door
a very little way, place a well-filled coal-scuttle on the top of the door,
inside; any one suddenly entering from without will be probably stunned,
perhaps killed, by the fall: in either case an excellent game for two players.
 Chairy-wary.-This game (of Italian origin, we believe) is very funny,
and does not require much preparation for its execution. Watch a stout
elderly gentleman rise to trim the lamp (which should be placed temptingly
before him), and remove his chair quietly: he will, in attempting to sit
down, fall heavily on the floor, and probably injure himself for life. Some
finish up the game by kicking the player who is down on the head, but
this, though amusing, involves the game in unnecessary complications.
It is capital fun and Very exciting.


 CROWNEE'S QUEST LAW.-Not long ago, at an inquest on a body
recovered from a pond of water which had collected in a gravel-pit in
the West of England, tho jury returned a verdict of "found drowned
in a gravel-pit." The coroner requested them to amend their verdict
by the addition of the words "there being water in the place."
 THE RIGHT WORD.-Tho feeling experienced by the parties satirized
in the Nil hiDrpen, can only be fitly described as a frantic state of
indigo-nation.
 BOOKS.-New edition of STRYPE'S memorials,-a slave's back after
the lash.
 WHAT is the proper material for a card-table ?-Deal.


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