OCTOBER 19, 1861.]


FUilT.


 GREECE,-ITS HUMOUROUS HISTORY.
 BY M'ASSA HOYLE.
 Illustrated with Sketches taken on the Spot.
 CHAPTER THE FIFTH.
 THE other great event of the Heroic Age was the Trojan war, all
 accounts of which should be received with many scruples, as they
 are none of them of very great troy weight. The cause of this
 disastrous event was PARIS, who, like the city of the same name, was
 continually in a state of ferment. His father, PRI A, having been
 forewarned as to the pleasant prospect in store for him, was most
 anxious to get his Paris kid off his hands, and ordered a slave to put
 him out of the way, which the slave did, by exposing PARIS on mount
 Ida, and himself to considerable danger in case of discovery. Some
 peasants, finding him at the bottom of the hill, kindly brought him
 up. Having, at a grand exhibition of beauty, awarded the palm to
 VENUS, that goddess, in return, gave him her hand, and promised
 him the loveliest woman in the world as a fair reward for his
 discrimination. Though terribly blown up by the other two
 goddesses, he felt considerably inflated with VENUs's promise, and
 shortly after left his pa to go to Sparta, where HELEN-the result of
 that extraordinary game of "follow my LEDA" which JUPITER had
 once played-was residing with'her husband MENELAUS. If it be true
 that HELEN really sprang from an egg, we have no doubt that her
 husband would have counselled the parent to as nmamn lay as possible.
 PARIs pretended at Lacedomon that he had crossed the Mare to
 sacrifice to A-POLL-O, and MENELAUS received him kindly, but soon
found how, alas, a demon he had cherished. In MENELAUS's absence


PARIS carried on dreadfully, and eventually carried off HEr.E. to
TROY, which her husband, on his coming back, stigmatized as an
ungrateful return. As all HELEN's rejected suitors had bound them-
selves to protect her in case of violence, MENELA s found that,
though considerably affronted, lie was exceedingly well backed, and
immediately commenced that wonderful campaign which has fur-
nished Ho3ERi with a theme for a mighty poem, and our gifted artist
an opportunity of showing his powers of carrying out his Lowther-
Arcadian conceptions. The Greeks, having in vain attempted to
destroy the walls, but having only been able to claim the title of
army razors by cutting away occasionally very sharply, and being
altogether too well fed and fat to go to scale, came at last to the con-
clusion that as the walls were not to be got over, they had better devote
themselves to an attempt to get over the inhabitants. Acting on
this notion, they gave a sort of Wood-in entertainment for man and
beast; that is to say, they cut down all the fir-trees they could find,
and took to horse-dealing, by building up a gigantic animal with a
hollow inside to carry a thousand men. This they sent as a com-
pliment to the bravery of the gallant defenders. The horse was
taken in by the Trojans, and the Trojans were taken in by tlie horse,
for they soon discovered that the compliment was certainly not anl
empty one-in fact, that the gigantic horse was, after all, only a lilly.
As soon as the animal was within the walls, the Greeks came out
very strong, and finished Troy that very week. Troy was des-troyed
four hundred and eight years before the first Olympiad, in the throo
thousand five hundred and thirtieth year of the JULIAN period, on the
night of the eleventh of June, eleven hundred and eighty-fnur years
before the Christian Era. There, we like to be particular in dates,
and to avoid anything resembling confusion.


 A PRESENT FOlt PRIAf.


 SLAlfIES' BEWARE!--We have a211 since the days of SIIAKSPEARE, Wir is a man who looks sharply after his children not fit for the
 implicitly believed that "we know not what we may be;" but present age ?-Because he's two eyes for his.gencration. ('hiscon-
 modern chemistry has proved pretty satisfactorily to us-and more tributor's case is coming on shortly, when we shall prosecute hli
 especially to the ladies-that we are sometimes rather uncertain as with the utmost rigour of the oh, law!)
to what we wear., TIT, FA[ILY HEIRALD."-The "monthly nurse."


 VOL. T. F


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