the two old men were almost sure to | would begin to collar one another, and
meet in the greatest thoroughfare in | no doubt there would soon have been @
town. At it they would go as fast as | fight between them, had not some peace-
ever their tongues could rattle, blowing | loving neighbor have interfered, and, al-
one another up—foaming and raving, | though he failed in reconciling them,
and stamping their sticks upon the patched up for the time a temporary
ground, and clenching their fists in each | cessation of hostilities.

other’s faces—neither of them hearing | So matters progressed, till the fre-
a word which the other said, but from | quency of their quarrels caused some
the earnest manner, and vehemence of mutual friend to interfere, and inquire
action, each believing the other was | into the cause ; when, to the astonish-
maintaining the accusation which the | ment and amusement of them both,
mischief-making young nephew had first | “my nephew” was found out; and
founded. «You say I get drunk every | heartily did they laugh as the explana-
night,” the deaf old uncle would ex- tion was in turns hammered into their
claim, stamping his stick as he spoke. | ears ; and a dozen times did the merry
«You say I turned your pigs out of the | old men rise and shake hands ; then sit
stye last night ” old Barton would ex- | down again to laugh ; for the friend
claim, shaking his cane at him. ‘Show
me the man I ever owed a shilling to in
my life!” roared out the one. “I never
did anybody an injury since I was
born!” bellowed the other. “I'll have
an action against you for damaging my
character,” shouted the uncle, loud
enough to be heard half way down the
street, so loud, indeed, that the word
damage struck the dull drum of deaf
Billy’s ear, and he echoed between his
teeth—‘‘ Damages, you old rogue, you
let ’em out yourself—you know you
did, on purpose to injure my character,
because I voted against you at the last
election—you rabid old Tory, you!”
«“T’ve got as many half-guineas as you,”
hollaed out the old uncle; “and have
no need to borrow of anybody! you
vile, wicked, slandering, old rascal! I
shall see you some morning whipped at
a cart’s tail! Oh! I wish the good old
pillories still stood !” and he would bring
his huge stick within a foot of poor
harmless deaf Billy’s face; then they

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
  
 

scene of excellent mischief, which they
had agreed to put into operation ; and
the thought of it so tickled their old

again louder than they even did when
abusing each other. Nay, I verily be-
lieve, that from the bottom of their

had so many quarrels without any cause,

up,” as they called it, in the presence
of their common enemy. Nor was it
long before an opportunity presented
itself; for the nephew had been at his

their designs, that he, suspecting nothing,
bade us, as he’d often done, to “ make
haste, and come along, to see such a row
between his uncle and old Barton.”
Wicked fellows that we were! No
hounds ever set off with more willingness
to hunt a fox, than we did to see a rup

|

|

fancies with delight, that they roared —

hearts, they were glad that they had —

merely for the sake of the “making it:

old work, and they pretended, as usual,
to believe all that he said ; and so well
did they mimic a passion, and conceal”

 

who reconciled them had concocted a

sh ei Rs,
pw tae 3

—