THE YOUTH’S CABINET. 15

 

The Deaf Old Men —

@ HAVE got a laughable story | every shilling I’m worth. I’ve never
to tell you about two been intoxicated since the last election:
old men, which you will | and as to money, I never borrowed a
find a good moral in; farthing of him in my life, or of any-
for it is a great shame, | body living—and I’ll go tell him so to
and very wicked, to pick he face, that I will—the lying old

g Sport out of the infirmities of | rogue!” and he would take up his stout

mankind, even if we do no in- = walking-staff. and sally out to put

   
  

jury to any one. I well remem- | his threat into execution, Before this,
ber a waggish youth who would | however, the young scamp had been to
have fun, whatever it might cost him, | old Billy Barton, cramming him with a
and never seemed so happy as when he parcel of lies, and telling him what his
was about some work of mischief; and | uncle had said about him,
when he could amuse himself no other “Mr. Barton!” he would holla into
way, he would begin playing trick: with | his ear, while old Billy was taking his
his deaf uncle. There was an old neigh- | walk at the other end of the town, “my
bor, who lived opposite, quite as dull _uncle says you undid his stye-door last
of hearing as his uncle was, for neither | night, and let his pigs out—somebody
the one nor the other could hear him- | saw you—and they’ve eaten up all the
self speak; and it was the delight of , peas and young cabbage, and rooted up
this Scapegrace of a nephew to set these | the flower-beds, and done five pounds’
w> deaf old men together by the ears ;| worth of damage—and he’s gone to
and as neither of them could hear what get a warrant out against you—and I
the other said, you may readily imagine | thought I would tell you, that you
what a droll scene an explanation must might make it up with him without going
have been between them. This grace- | to law.”
less young scamp first poured his poison} You may easily fancy how old Billy
into the ear of one, then into the ear of raved and stormed after such a charge
the other. Every two or three days he/as this, for deaf as he was, he could
would say to his deaf relative, « Uncle, | make himself heard; and how he set
old Billy Barton says you get drunk | off at once to repel the accusation and
every night—that you run up a score | defend himself—not having time, in the
everywhere, when any one will trust [heat of his passion, to ‘inquire who this
you—and that you owe money to every | “somebody” was, that had seen him,
publican in the place—and have never and brought the charge against him.
paid him the last half-guinea he lent! Meantime the young scamp used to
you, uncle—and he stops everybody he | run and assemble his companions in the
meets to tell them of it!” Street, to witness, as he would say,
“He’s an old rascal—and doesn’t | « such a row between his uncle and old
speak the truth—and I’ll have an action Barton ;” and the nephew so managed

 

 

against him—that I will—if it costs me | matters, and measured his distance, that