Eulogy for my mother


Tom Cappiello


LIVING WITH CANCER MY DIARY
I was diagnosed with stage 3A locally advanced
adenocarcinoma (nonsmall cell lung cancer) in
October of 2007. lam one of the few survivors of
this terminal disease. My diary is written to give
cancer patients hope and understanding about life
after a cancer diagnosis.
This is for those who are being treated for cancer
and those caring for a loved one. If you are
interested in becoming involved in lung cancer
awareness, research and early detection, contact
Tom Cappiello attecappiello@gmail.com.

 Ann D. Cappiello
 (Anna Mae Donovan)
 July 14, 1923-Jan. 10,2014
 One of my favorite movies is Frank
Capra's "It's a Wonderful Life" starring
Donna Reed and James Stewart. The
movie was made in 1946, but it is not
hard to imagine that it could also be
the setting for the story of our moth-
er's life. In the movie, Mom would
be Mary Hatch, the character who
marries George Bailey.
 The central theme of "It's a
Wonderful Life" was self-sacrifice
for others and how one life touches
and influences many other lives. My
mother's life touched and changed
the lives of many people.
 Today my family members are the
beneficiaries of the love Mom heaped
upon us. Her dedication to our family
helped make us who we are. We owe
her a great debt of gratitude that we


can never repay.
 For 50 plus years Mom was chief
cook and bottle washer and head
cheerleader for our family. As family
matriarch, she never stopped rooting
for us. She beamed with pride when it
came to family most especially her
five children and 15 grandchildren.
In her eyes, we could do no wrong.
She loved each and every one of us,
unconditionally.
 Mom was a Depression-era child.
She was born to Tim and Mary
Donovan in Bristol, Conn. on July 14,
1923, when automobiles were still a
new invention. Mom arrived on scene
just five years after the armistice that
ended World War I. Mom was proud
of her father's career in road construc-
tion for the City of Bristol, his military
service in World War I, and her Irish
heritage the Donovan and Moody
family lines.
 She was the first child and only girl
in her family of four, followed by my
Uncle Bob, Uncle Bill and Uncle Tim,
who was, she kidded, literally a baby
brother who could have been her
baby. Tim was 17 years her junior.
 Mom deeply loved her brothers. She
was unabashedly proud of them and
all of their many accomplishments.
But even more, she was proud of
the personal courage they displayed
in the face of adversity, which is a
Donovan trait.
 Mom was 18 years old when Pearl
Harbor was attacked, triggering the
American entry into World War II.
She was a young adult during the
war, which ended with the bombing
of Hiroshima and the dawn of the
nuclear age.
 After graduating from Bristol High
in 1940, Mom enrolled in school to
become a nurse but by the time she
completed her medical education,
the war had ended. In the 1940s she
found work as an RN, which ultimate-
ly led to her meeting my father, who
was one of her patients. They fell in
love and were married in 1952. Mom
never worked outside the home again.
 When did she have time? In the
1950s Mom was nearly continuously
pregnant. She had my brother Frank
in 1953, Jane in 1954, me in 1955 and
Linda in 1957. It was the dawn of
television and newfangled electric ap-
pliances. Disposable diapers had not
yet been invented. It would be safe to
say that my mother remembered the
1950s for diapers rather than for the


 PH'-.T-. PPC'-., ICDEDC,
Ann Cappiello, second from right, is pictured with grandchildren (from left) Jessie Cappiello-Devine,
Tim Batten and Mike Oldsey.


bitlli ,f lck '' oll' NhI\ sistei Peggy
didhl't collie alonw util lP-1651
 NI\ mom I in ld d;id vikLed liaiId tI
ctue -, ,it i l failil t- :;I \e-- e \\e
:iex uip ii lhe _'0he tlhe \Vieniaim
eii aiid canine of, -\e iii lre 70st
FImill. IiI tlhe mid- lh'-..0S. Dad sold
li, I btlmies, Tlie\ in',oed tIo, Flildai
ait tlhe d;\vii tle h eit elt i:e I,-,
eiil,,\ tlieii timlighli" \eais, Fl-i iiealh
c,, decades, tlie\ lvhed a c,-,,-,i-table
le ieiel el plai\in ol__, tiaveel ,_..
lolimi,: iemieldS ,: i ,l Iildge ':i pokei.
;aid keeping_ a blV,\ -,clal c;ileed;ii
ait tlhie Bit lloi _lie ii, ,-,v T]. il llei
Comiin Clusib Tliev iad minam\ go:'d
Seiieds Iii, PuII,; G-olida
 III ai lifetime tlihiat lated 'i0 \eais.
thlieie ;ie ai lt of,-toile b. Iut II i tihe
miteie. t ,_, sp.ice. let ime jlii t ,ai\ tlihiat
NImin liaid ai \,'n idei ill\ imcli life,.
dedicated I tlhe taimn il ind fii enid,
,lie lo,,ed
 Nkl inn asi m\v tiliei's h, it mid
onI\ love a;nd lie \\as lieis- Tlie\ \eie
de 'ot'ed I,-, eaicli ohiei cieaitmi_ lie
iock uponii lhuchli ill ,A uis chiMldieni
;nid gi-uidchildien -- built uim lhves
IMomin iigliht i, ut lie \aile thliat ill
c ui\ oI i ,_ toi tgeiiei l. i tI.,-, co-ml e _hlie
\xill alxa \s be leeinmembeied aa ;i l-\inig
in'lihei iand g.iiidmnotrliei. ai devo-'tred
tife. ;-i SISi .;i _id ciiiHiMCi )memid
 Tlhie -ie people III tlihu :l d hli
aiie ieplaiceiable F,_iemoi,-,t ;-1 aimog:'
tliehe iie ,iii in'mliei,We \\e :nIl\ lihiae


lone. aiid h lien tlie e\ e _o'lie. i t le-ive,
a g ipmg while in ,Im hieatiit,
 Nk-in -li ed ai 'xvldeifliiI life diliiiig:
tlhe im'-, iiit eiesillc 'f t, ne il ie
'tidlcied anid cliaiiiged inmiii\ ie,
.\id ih;tloughi e kii;, shIie i, ii ai bettei
plaice liiappil\ letiiited wil ith im
ft[lhei anad ;-ill tlih_-,se shie lihas, kI,,ii.
\hI,:, lia l e gone bet,:,ie tlS -- shie will
be nuised b\ ;iall i u. ,, foie\ei, loed.
;a1d iievel ei ,-,ligi-tteii


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