Eulogy for my mother Tom Cappiello LIVING WITH CANCER MY DIARY I was diagnosed with stage 3A locally advanced adenocarcinoma (nonsmall cell lung cancer) in October of 2007. lam one of the few survivors of this terminal disease. My diary is written to give cancer patients hope and understanding about life after a cancer diagnosis. This is for those who are being treated for cancer and those caring for a loved one. If you are interested in becoming involved in lung cancer awareness, research and early detection, contact Tom Cappiello attecappiello@gmail.com. Ann D. Cappiello (Anna Mae Donovan) July 14, 1923-Jan. 10,2014 One of my favorite movies is Frank Capra's "It's a Wonderful Life" starring Donna Reed and James Stewart. The movie was made in 1946, but it is not hard to imagine that it could also be the setting for the story of our moth- er's life. In the movie, Mom would be Mary Hatch, the character who marries George Bailey. The central theme of "It's a Wonderful Life" was self-sacrifice for others and how one life touches and influences many other lives. My mother's life touched and changed the lives of many people. Today my family members are the beneficiaries of the love Mom heaped upon us. Her dedication to our family helped make us who we are. We owe her a great debt of gratitude that we can never repay. For 50 plus years Mom was chief cook and bottle washer and head cheerleader for our family. As family matriarch, she never stopped rooting for us. She beamed with pride when it came to family most especially her five children and 15 grandchildren. In her eyes, we could do no wrong. She loved each and every one of us, unconditionally. Mom was a Depression-era child. She was born to Tim and Mary Donovan in Bristol, Conn. on July 14, 1923, when automobiles were still a new invention. Mom arrived on scene just five years after the armistice that ended World War I. Mom was proud of her father's career in road construc- tion for the City of Bristol, his military service in World War I, and her Irish heritage the Donovan and Moody family lines. She was the first child and only girl in her family of four, followed by my Uncle Bob, Uncle Bill and Uncle Tim, who was, she kidded, literally a baby brother who could have been her baby. Tim was 17 years her junior. Mom deeply loved her brothers. She was unabashedly proud of them and all of their many accomplishments. But even more, she was proud of the personal courage they displayed in the face of adversity, which is a Donovan trait. Mom was 18 years old when Pearl Harbor was attacked, triggering the American entry into World War II. She was a young adult during the war, which ended with the bombing of Hiroshima and the dawn of the nuclear age. After graduating from Bristol High in 1940, Mom enrolled in school to become a nurse but by the time she completed her medical education, the war had ended. In the 1940s she found work as an RN, which ultimate- ly led to her meeting my father, who was one of her patients. They fell in love and were married in 1952. Mom never worked outside the home again. When did she have time? In the 1950s Mom was nearly continuously pregnant. She had my brother Frank in 1953, Jane in 1954, me in 1955 and Linda in 1957. It was the dawn of television and newfangled electric ap- pliances. Disposable diapers had not yet been invented. It would be safe to say that my mother remembered the 1950s for diapers rather than for the PH'-.T-. PPC'-., ICDEDC, Ann Cappiello, second from right, is pictured with grandchildren (from left) Jessie Cappiello-Devine, Tim Batten and Mike Oldsey. bitlli ,f lck '' oll' NhI\ sistei Peggy didhl't collie alonw util lP-1651 NI\ mom I in ld d;id vikLed liaiId tI ctue -, ,it i l failil t- :;I \e-- e \\e :iex uip ii lhe _'0he tlhe \Vieniaim eii aiid canine of, -\e iii lre 70st FImill. IiI tlhe mid- lh'-..0S. Dad sold li, I btlmies, Tlie\ in',oed tIo, Flildai ait tlhe d;\vii tle h eit elt i:e I,-, eiil,,\ tlieii timlighli" \eais, Fl-i iiealh c,, decades, tlie\ lvhed a c,-,,-,i-table le ieiel el plai\in ol__, tiaveel ,_.. lolimi,: iemieldS ,: i ,l Iildge ':i pokei. ;aid keeping_ a blV,\ -,clal c;ileed;ii ait tlhie Bit lloi _lie ii, ,-,v T]. il llei Comiin Clusib Tliev iad minam\ go:'d Seiieds Iii, PuII,; G-olida III ai lifetime tlihiat lated 'i0 \eais. thlieie ;ie ai lt of,-toile b. Iut II i tihe miteie. t ,_, sp.ice. let ime jlii t ,ai\ tlihiat NImin liaid ai \,'n idei ill\ imcli life,. dedicated I tlhe taimn il ind fii enid, ,lie lo,,ed Nkl inn asi m\v tiliei's h, it mid onI\ love a;nd lie \\as lieis- Tlie\ \eie de 'ot'ed I,-, eaicli ohiei cieaitmi_ lie iock uponii lhuchli ill ,A uis chiMldieni ;nid gi-uidchildien -- built uim lhves IMomin iigliht i, ut lie \aile thliat ill c ui\ oI i ,_ toi tgeiiei l. i tI.,-, co-ml e _hlie \xill alxa \s be leeinmembeied aa ;i l-\inig in'lihei iand g.iiidmnotrliei. ai devo-'tred tife. ;-i SISi .;i _id ciiiHiMCi )memid Tlhie -ie people III tlihu :l d hli aiie ieplaiceiable F,_iemoi,-,t ;-1 aimog:' tliehe iie ,iii in'mliei,We \\e :nIl\ lihiae lone. aiid h lien tlie e\ e _o'lie. i t le-ive, a g ipmg while in ,Im hieatiit, Nk-in -li ed ai 'xvldeifliiI life diliiiig: tlhe im'-, iiit eiesillc 'f t, ne il ie 'tidlcied anid cliaiiiged inmiii\ ie, .\id ih;tloughi e kii;, shIie i, ii ai bettei plaice liiappil\ letiiited wil ith im ft[lhei anad ;-ill tlih_-,se shie lihas, kI,,ii. \hI,:, lia l e gone bet,:,ie tlS -- shie will be nuised b\ ;iall i u. ,, foie\ei, loed. ;a1d iievel ei ,-,ligi-tteii Team Eye Consultant Tampa Bay Rays and Charlotte Stone Crabs ^11_VOTED BEST 23 OPHTHALMOLOGIST fl, 2011-2013 624-4500 Thousands of Health Stories from Feeling Fit & WebMD wwFeeling Fit0 0+ -*o i ^ a ' BOARD CERTIFIED PLASTIC SURGEON c CONNOLL Syl LaserWrinkle and Age Spot Removal .TOPDOCTORS www.chrisconstance.com (941) NEW-LOOK CHRISTOPHER G. CONSTANCE, MD, FACS THE PATIENT AND ANY OTHER PERSON RESPONSIBLE FOR PAYMENT HAS A RIGHT TO REFUSE TO PAY, :-1 I :11 ;ii 1:1 1:i- 1- I 1T, -11 :.TI;I = ;i ii TREATMENTTHAT ISPERFORMEDASARESULTOFANDWITHIN72HOURSOFRESPONDINGTOTHEADVERTIS I -11I 1 1 I, TI-,=, - :Page 6 The Sun /Surnclay .lariialy !':I 4 www.sunnewspapers.net feelingfit.com